Wednesday, October 12, 2016

We made it! HBD #2

Three whole months since I have made a declaration into the blogosphere. Ohhh I have started many an entries and haven't finished a one. This one, I will.

Two years since I became a twin mom to Dru and Roxy. It's such an inclusive little group within a sometimes snooty group [moms] but I love the support this momtourage comes with, like woah.

To me being a twin mom is easier than being a mom of two babies, or two in diapers, who are several months apart. Things change drastically, sometimes dramatically, when babies are babies. You don't want one on baby food and the other on solids, what a disaster...

I want to say this and you can be for me or against me- but I have rocked this twin mom thing. I have two kids who say please and thank you and about a thousand other words. They know who their Heavenly Father is and they know how to pray. They know how to worship. They know how to apologize and show forgiveness. They understand second chances and what it looks like to blow it. They understand the encouragement of patting a friend on the back and they have the servant's heart to bring their Pop Pop the paper every morning. Being a twin means innately desiring to share. There isn't one thing that one baby (stop it, they will always be babies) gets that he/she doesn't immediately turn and ask for their sibling the like. It has been such an incredible journey. The first time they kissed me on the lips, the first time they held my hand-just because, the first time they said "I love you", when we are alone in the car and I sneeze and I have two "God bless you, Mommy!"- I mean are you for real? I would do this a thousand times over the exact same way..except for the part where my ticker gave out, but everything else has been a blast. Truly. The babies have seem some incredible places and visited some spectacular sites but the best part of it all was just being with them almost every second and taking in, breathing in the best part of them every day, so that I can always remember.

Thank you to those who have helped Trey and I on this journey of twin-dom. Some of you we couldn't have done it without. BIG BIG HUGE shoutout to the two sitters and the grammas. I absolutely could not have done ANYthing (literally) without you. I put my whole trust of my whole heart in your arms- thank you for loving them like you do. They love you right back.

Here's just a few from the last few months..

 This pretty much sums up their relationship.
 Lovies for life.
 boo boos and thumb sucking
Happy Birthday #2, Flower Mound Pumpkin Patch

Thursday, July 28, 2016


Welp. I'm back. It's "Take 6" and I'm not even sure if I will get to the end of this one and hit the ever elusive publish. I haven't been able to finish a blog in over a month. It's not writer's block- it's just gibberish. Mostly after pasting it all together this morning I realize that it really IS just a bunch of existential crap all of which had my eyes focused in the wrong direction. There are so many people, bloggers, geniuses and idiots- all writing about politics and the inevitable fall of I? I shall write about MY life. There isn't any one else who could do that, so at least it is original..if even a little boring.

34. Here I am in my 35th year technically...My analytical nature brings me great peace in the mini-wisdom that my mistakes and circumstances have afforded me. I see you making that same mistake and I stand with you. I don't stand in agreement with you and I know this won't turn out well, but I stand here nonetheless. Sometimes my spirit SCREAMS so loud.."What in FRESH HELL are you DOING?!!" but my sweet Holy Spirit quiets me, silences me and forces me to keep standing. So that's pretty much how the whole situation with me and Jesus is. He's pretty much the Whole Deal, the Real Deal- for me anyway- all the time.

The best part. My Family. The one I chose and that chose me. The Scalfs. My littles..well more like mediums. The flesh of my flesh walks around here everyday making everyone's day a whole lot brighter. One with her stunningly steel blue eyes (they remind me muchly of my cousin Tai's) and the other one with a whole-face-smile that doesn't quit.

They are really into breaking down their daddy and I by calling us "Tata" and "Trey" #notcoolkid #notcool They call every drink "milk" and their favorite game as of late is..."Guess who's coming over?" to which they go down the list of their faves to guess the visitor. We hear a lot of sentences coming from those little mouths but the most common is probably "Where's Lovie?". My new favorite of course is "hode jew" This means HOLD YOU. They kill me with this. My back kills me with this when I'm alone with them and both babies are all "hode jew Mama" #forthelove But I almost NEVER say "no". Babies don't keep and all that. Signs they know: SORRY, ILY, PLEASE,THANK YOU, MILK, ORANGE, FINISHED, DRINK, BANANA, WASH, BATH, TOOTHBRUSH..Not too bad for kids of a signer. I'm working on it.

Here are some recent sneaks at a sesh with Dru and Roxy.

Pictured: Dembabies and Lovies

Sunday, May 8, 2016

HMD Musings

My Mama. She's a complex character. I think about the timeline of events in her life told to my cousins and me by the throng of Aunts that fill our backyards for random celebrations. Each sibling brings something profound to the mix of years gone by. Different perspectives litter the stories we are each told by our respective parent.
I can look back and see how different life was for my mom and her siblings. In some ways our world has become fierce- but there are also things that our parents saw and experienced that we will never be able to wrap our minds around. Think about the complexities of your own childhood and trying to put it in a square box with a big red bow. If it works like that, you're in the minority. 
My mom had me at 30. She wasn't expecting any more kids as she had almost 2 teenagers and BAM. Life changer. (That's me) I just want to honor her for being the fierce warrior that she is. She has been an incredible cheerleader and supporter to me in all my endeavors. Anything my mom cooks is the best thing I have ever tasted (that's pretty standard, no?) and she once talked me through replacing my washer's motor myself over the phone. She isn't a people pleaser and she's bold and I got both of those lovely traits from her. #thanksmom 
Bless her, she's best friends with my babies and I am LOVING every second of it. Thank you Mom. Happy Mother's Day. I love you exactly where you are for who you are.
I also want to give a significant Shout Out to moms of fur babies. Before I mothered those two nuts I was up for #dogmomoftheday once or twice. I love how FULL pets can make our lives and YOU loving on those babies is SO important. Happy Mothers Day to you Furmamas.
One last thing, some people are hurting today.
A. #alllivesmatter like #allwomenmatter and #notjustmoms <--------- ya dig?
2. Moms whose kiddos have beat them to heaven, and kiddos whose moms await them there.
Finally, Want-to-be-a-moms. Their hearts ache to have and hold and love a little one.
I am thoughtfully lifting up your hurts and asking God to exchange them for JOY.
Big love to all the moms on mother's day- and to Dru and Roxy, who made me a mama, I'm the best I will ever be thanks to you (and Jesus). I love you so much.

Wednesday, April 13, 2016


Today I find out if I'm equipped to take my twin 1.5 year olds two hours out of the time zone and live to enjoy telling about it. Chances are, no matter the hassle- there's always the dazzle.

Trey and I love to try new foods, local places and random adventures. Sometimes there is sand, sometimes there's mountains but there is always sweet memories- and some...we can just leave those at the airport. Sidenote: Often times the airport can be the absolute most stressful CRAP place ever. And sometimes? It just takes me away like Calgon. (Not in the last 1.5 years)

I am not complaining. I have only been on one trip without my babes and I enjoyed EVERY second of it. When they are with me though- I feel full. It's a LOT of work. I am having a serious momager moment and not remembering if I have told you my favorite quote about traveling before. If I have- swell- you'll hear it again!

Modern Family- There is a scene when the whole family is arriving to their resort in Hawaii.
I am going to loosely translate.
Phil- Come on!  Let's turn this vacation into a honeymoon.
Claire- Honey I am a mom here with her kids, this isn't a vacation. It's a business trip. like. for real.

Anyway, I try to be less business and more pleasure and the things I do that make that easier are:

1. Air BNB or VRBO. If you travel ever and have kids, this is the way to go. There just aren't the amenities in a hotel that a family needs. You never know if you're going to have to whip up a dinner or breakfast- and it's hard to travel to hotels with a tiny little fridge. I need things in there to keep these campers happy or things can get cray! Also, the separate bedrooms are a must. My kids go to bed at 7-8pm no matter what/where/who/how. I don't want to sneak around a one bedroom hotel room after they go to bed. If we are in a home, then we just hang out, like at home! this all seems very redundant.  You can find almost anything to fit your budget and you can spend more or less than you would on a hotel.

2. Pack and plays. I bring two. My kids won't sleep if they are in the same one. Some twins share sweet cuddles and sweaty pillow face. Mine share throwing each other's lovies out of the crib and kicking each other in the ribs/face/back. So- two it is. Also, things that smell like home that go IN the pack and play. I bring freshly washed sheets, blankets and lovies for the whole trip and keep them in the suitcase until they're needed. Theydie.

3. Other travel adds: We bring our stroller. Today, we brought our stroller and forgot about it at baggage claim along with our 3 suitcases, 2 car seats and 2 pack and plays. So..we went to pick up our rental car and proceeded to get lost for an hour trying to get BACK into the airport-to get the stroller.  The moral of the story? There isn't one. Don't be an idiot and forget your stroller in the first place.

4. Unpack and rest the first day. That's what I'm doing. See y'all on the flip!

Monday, March 28, 2016

Reflections (all the puns intended)

When the world feels heavy and you are down on yourself, remember who MADE you. Think of the way you look at the faces around you- in their imperfections you see love and if you look really hard you can sometimes see the reflection of their maker.

We want our children to reflect our values, just like God created us to reflect His.  (Genesis 1:27)
Things that we hold important we pass down to our children and even those things that we don't esteem- they grasp onto and adopt as their own. (Like sexism, racism, all the isms)

In our home we love Jesus first and foremost. We give of ourselves and anything we have with everything we have. We keep our family time sacred. We practice Self Care (massages, facials, pedicures, check up, meds, preventative care). We travel, a lot. We appreciate the things God and man have made all over the world. We respect and admire other cultures and we get our feet wet.  We set boundaries and limits that we are comfortable with and that have been prayerfully agreed upon in our marriage, in our parenting and in our relationships. We support the right for people to love whomever they choose and their right to enter into a covenant and contract with that person. We are feminists. We believe that everyone has a story and a right to their own sorrow. We understand that not everyone will like us and that we are not everyone's cup of tea. Not all of you are ours, but we will spend the rest of our lives making you believe that you ARE. We pray you all feel like you ARE our cup of tea....and that we love you. You will always be cherished and loved by us- because you are our people. Also, we are God's people and we were created in His image, whether you're in on it or not, so were you. 

These two messy faced babes, they were created by Him for Him and through Him...but He blessed ME to be their mama. He picked the sweetest and smartest man to be their daddy and he picked an amazing village to rally around them as they grow. That's you people. 

I look into their eyes... and I know I see myself and my husband in each of them, sometimes quite literally. It's the best reminder to keep living out the life for which I was created, even if my face gets messy in the process. 

#besteasterever #allthemessyfaces

Sunday, February 28, 2016

RBF, NYC and Super Tuesday.

There are certainly 80 thousand thoughts (obvious hyperbole) running through my head at any given moment. I try to get them all out during the day- this explains the RBF and why I look lost most of the time, I usually am- I'm lost in thought.

The beauty of this whole thing Jesus and I have going is that in my thoughts, I can almost.. mostly..usually... focus them towards Him so it's almost like I pray ALL day. This is where I started using the term #prayerjunkie. I can't confirm if this term has already been copyrighted so...if so...They can insert their name here ______________________ as to not feel slighted. Back to the crazy.

Do you see what I'm up against here?

Politics. (gasP) Settle the crap down. Everyone is up in arms. Put your arms down and do some research. Put your research down and do some praying. Put your hands down and open your ears.
There is no man, woman or child that wouldn't be picked to pieces by the media when running for president and this election is no different. People hate Trump, people hate Hillary- but mostly people just hate people and that irritates me more than anything.

New York City. I just went there. Are you kidding me? Could that city absolutely define its cliches better than any other place? Could it BE more amaze balls? I am starting to see why Carrie wouldn't shut up about it for 10 seasons of Sex and the City. I don't care what kind of sex everyone was having, the CITY is SO....inclusive. Everyone is just different and speaking different languages and dressed different and annoying in their own way and they are all just in place, where they are supposed to be, smooshed together..and for the most part? Happy about it. My favorite smell filled the air, the smell of restaurant food. Does that made me a foodie or a fattie? Either way- every whiff down a different street was a cultural blend of something I had never heard of and couldn't wait to try. There wasn't enough space in my stomach or life in my legs to do all the doing I wanted to do while we were there- but fear not! NYC is not going anywhere and I am sure my family's adventures there have only just begun.

Jesus, Fam, Travel, Rinse, Repeat <===== AS long as I can I will do this and it will be boldly done and I will boldly go where few twin moms have gone before....but I am praying through it all. I am praying for the country and for the city. I am praying for relationships, friendships and most of all- I am praying for---- EVOLVING MINDS---seeing what we are given and turning it into a lesson, a sharing session or something else that God will make amazing.

Go and be love. and don't forget to V O T E

As a parting gift- beautiful, cherished and blessed babies on Valentine's Day.

Monday, January 25, 2016

Things you don't know until after the fact..

I'll take "Foot in my Mouth" for 200 please, Alex?? NO? How about "Apologies I should've made for 300, Alex.? NO?!

I had no idea what the things on my bucket list were until I started experiencing them!

Trey bought me a writing prompt book this past weekend. He knows my heart and the enjoyment I get in answering questions about my selfish self. The first question- What are the top 10 items on your bucket list? Crap. I have no idea what the rest of them are, but the few that I DO know- I have already experienced. -I feel like you should know that the ultimate best in my life is Jesus, all this stuff is only cool because He and I are tight- #thatisall

1. Swinging on the same rope as Indiana Jones in Hawaii on the trip of a lifetime with my family. (Thanks Dad)

2. Snorkeling in the middle of the ocean. (every time)

3. Studying abroad. (Scotland forever!)

4. Building two babies at once.

5. Snowmobiling to the Continental Divide at Sunset.

6. Watch Baby A start walking....  <---------------  ALL THE BIG EYED EMOJIS HERE!!!!!

Little Dru walked right out of Sunday School class yesterday like he'd been walking since birth. He held his daddy's hand and carefully took each step forward as we walked out of the church and toward the car. He would stop and look back, smile with pride and forge on. That sweet little grin.

He wanted to know I was right behind him watching him walk right out of babyhood.

I'll be right behind you buddy, all the way...Just then I mentally filled in, and immediately, checked off Bucket List item number 6.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Holidays in the States

Our family started the 2016 New Year in Denver, Colorado. We visit often to see my step-son, enjoy the local recreations and stare, with jaws dropped, at the incredible creation that God planted in the middle of our country. Leaving the country has appeal, but home, home is visceral. 

Traveling outside the country brings an exciting set of circumstances. Whether you're battling a language barrier, re-learning how to drive on the other side of the road or trying to constantly calculate a foreign money exchange- there's something so liberating about it. Here I am, World. I am a stranger in a strange land and I. LOVE. IT.  

Also, I'm the most awkward. I gawk and stare and will stop in the middle of the walkway to admire anything. I knock stuff over in almost every trinket store I have visited the world over- it's part of my charm. " I'm really sorry about that display shelf in the back. Did you see my beautiful babies?" Strolling them through any city store is worthy of an 'American Ninja Warrior' nod. IJS

So.. there they are at 12 months in all of their glory. Today we had their 15 month check up and it was as it has been- smooth sailing. I can be sure with the joy, and the source of it, in my life is enough to get me through any storm that may come my way. 

When Roxy sees a dog anywhere but home, where everything is as it should be, she points and she says "bay-bee". At home our 'puppy' is 160 lbs and 7 feet tall plus-on his hind legs. She sees one of our pups, points and says "dog" then proceeds to bark (usually). When she sees any other dog, she dubs it as a baby. 
No vicious, growling or intimidating breed of any kind will ever bother her. She will simply look at it and call it, "baby". No dog can scare her because at home she has a dog that is so big and massive and loud and stinky- everything else, any other mutt- just.can't.even.

I think about my joy like that. My joy is so big that when I face trials I just point them out and call them out.... babies. Get outta here you big babies!! My joy is so big and so massive and so loud that you don't get to hang out here! You literally.can't.even!!!!!!!!!

Trials come and go, but? The travel bug stays forever. 
In some weird automatic update at the end of last year my personal email was dubbed by Google under the name, "Holidays in the States" on my computer. <---- That is the only name I can pull up my address under on my apple products! I always loved how people in foreign countries go on "holiday" and stay for much longer than an american "vacation- so I will take it as a sign. I need to continue to holiday and I guess I should check out more of what "the states" have to offer! 

Next month, stay tuned for Valentine's pics with #dembabies and a trip to NYC. 

Big love, big joy.