Sunday, August 30, 2015

Ministry of Me 2

If you have grown up in church (or have ever been) you may or may not have heard the term "The ministry of Me Too."

When I first heard it- I knew that it was MY ministry. The best way that I can relate to others is by relating what they are going through to what I have been through. 
I have had a good life but with enough "near misses" that I am impacted by my experiences in a communicative way. I have experienced loss and sickness and grief and tragedy and unfairness just enough that through His glory- I can talk about it openly and honestly and help other people not feel so alone when they are going through the same thing. 

There are some bad things that happen that have no answers or explanation. Those are the times when we have to reach down deep inside of ourselves and recognize that while this sucks, it just opens us up to more opportunity to love on others who will go through the same thing. We all need each other in a very corny Boy Meets World way that a lot of us aren't willing to admit yet. Don't worry hard hearted friends, you will get there. You will be ridiculously optimistic one day too, if you let yourself. 

The thing about God is...if in His infinite wisdom He created the earth and its people and creatures and minds then I am almost positive He can handle my shenanigans. C'mon, little ole me?!!?? There's nothing going on with me that is too big for Him! And when it's done going on I will either let it create cynicism in me OR I will apply it for future use in my Ministry of Me Too. 

The point? We are entrenched in information daily and we all know at least one over sharer. If you're feeling like sharing join the Ministry of Me Too and touch someone's heart. 

No one should feel alone or ashamed, we all have junk. The end. 

Friday, August 14, 2015

Happy BD to My Babies- a short,mellow drama.

I promised myself I would share my birth story before #dembabies turned 1.

Here's how it went down...

I was 34 weeks and 4 days pregnant. I had been battling gestational diabetes fighting a diet and finger pricks and shots of insulin. My body hates me so naturally I wasn't responding to the insulin. My blood pressure had become a little erratic and I wanted to D I E.

[Sidenote: To ME, pregnancy is its own form of torture. I was sick all day every day for 4 months and after that felt like my guts were going to burst through my vagina at any moment, any step, any cough. I honor those women who have had many pregnancies and loved it and I pray for those who wanted pregnancy and haven't had it. But for me? I was not a good pregnant pupil.]

While I was visiting the hospital for a NST (non stress test) my doctor decided to keep me for observation because of all the fun things my body was doing. The babies were healthy but he wanted to watch my blood pressure and check my protein to rule out preeclampsia. I cried like a baby when he told me he was going to keep me for a few days. I had never slept in the hospital and I couldn't sleep as it was and I didn't have my hospital bag, dangit! 
My last picture of my bump @DRMC

Fast forward 4 days and many ADA (American Diabetic Association) approved meals later Dr A came in for my daily sonogram. I am not going to lie- I was looking for any way to speed up this whole labor and delivery process and I know he wanted me cooking for a couple more weeks, at least 5 more days. At last check both babies were head down and vaginal delivery was a possibility. After a quick check Roxy was transverse and Dru was a bit low on fluid. The low fluid was enough to move forward with a birthday (SQUEEEEE) but there was a possibility that I could labor and deliver Dru and still have to have a C section to get Roxy out. #strikethat

My BF Gigi showed up to love on me and braid my hair. Meredith and Ashley (two of my friends who happen to be deaf) showed up and provided me with some much needed distraction while the nurses hooked me up to fluids.

When we started rolling into the OR I had a calm come over me. I knew I was going to be medicated, I knew I had taken good care of my babies while they grew and I was so excited to meet them that day!

It was all fun and games as I lifted my dead legs onto the operating table and the numbness spread to my chest. I remembered my cousin telling me to breathe through my nose so I could monitor my breaths. I don't know if I did that but I did say the Lord's Prayer at least 90 times.

I think funny little nuances are what really makes a birth story memorable so you should probably note these few things:

-I got shaved... with visitors...even the  birth photographer was present.
-We smuggled a styrofoam cooler full of ice into the Operating Room (for us to steal our own placentas)
-We smuggled two placentas out of the the operating room to be encapsulated.
-I thanked God for the curtain.
-Saved by the anesthesiologist. S A V E D.
-Guts in a bucket. #thingsyoucantunsee #poortrey
-dark comedy in the recovery room with Gigi. #neveradullmoment
-TWO healthy babies. THANK YOU JESUS.

Our first moment of togetherness!

BF, baby, hubs- LOVE LOVE LOVE

The pain that I felt after the surgery was intense. The nurses told me that sometimes air gets trapped in your chest and it creates sharp pain in your chest. THAT was what hurt me the most. Not the incision. I'm not embarrassed to tell you that I was excited to see my belly. I hadn't seen my toes in months but who cares? I made Gigi take a picture of my belly while in the recovery room. They pretty much take the babies, everyone leaves. (My husband and the photographer-but not the Anesthesiologist bless her) They put your guts from the bucket back into your body and *fingers crossed* it all goes back into place and they sew you up. The hit me on the wall on the way into "recovery" but I just laughed because-drugs.

Gigi ran in after I had been lying there for a while wondering when I would see the babies and showed me a ton of pictures and loved on me and told me all what was going on with them. They needed some oxygen for a while and feedings through a tube- but they were healthy and they were amazing and they were HERE! 10/11/14

Welcome to the World Little Ones!

Daddy Prayed

I stayed in recovery for another hour and was transferred back to my room. I had pressure cuffs on my legs, two IVs, a stomach full of stitches, hella pain in my chest and my boobs were aching and filling like crazy but their request was "get some rest". (Insert obvious eye roll here)

Twelve hours of pain meds, prayer, tears and 'rest' I finally met my babies for the first time. Trey and I skinned to skinned until they kicked us out. It was a beautiful morning. 

Daddy and Roxy

Me and Dru
My first hold on the outside. 

I could tell this story a thousand different ways but NHance Photography pretty much nailed it.

Password to see this very personal experience of a lifetime is: dembabies

Saturday, August 1, 2015


Time. We talk about it all the time. We should hang out sometime. You can call me anytime. I remember that one time. Time flies. Time heals all wounds. It will happen when the time is right..

      We the people that form the extremely imperfect union of humanity put a lot of pressure on time. 
My favorite mind boggler to brain about is God's timing. While perfect- it is totally unknown to me and fully known to Him. I don't know what His timing computes as-but I imagine it runs somewhere close to Hawaiian time. 

We want time to slow down, but we countdown to an important event. In other news: The Scalfs has been having quite a good time lately. We spent a month in Key West (We=Me, Tia and babes) while Trey came back and forth to work and do the adulting in Denton. Meanwhile I drank Mai-Tais on the beach with an umbrella and beach service from my chair overlooking the- oh wait. I have babies. So let's be real, although my trip didn't look like the aforementioned scenario I still enjoyed it and appreciated it more than words can say- but I was the momager. Keeping the peace with two teething babies requires planning, but not a miracle. I just try and take the time to pack well and be prepared for everything, every time

Play time in Key West

First taste of ice-cream 

First taste of ice cream

Sink Baths

Dad and the mahi mahi

Trey's surprise for me!


Trey's tattoo #2

AM Family time on the pier

He's still the one...

Last dinner at Pepe's

Swimming babies

Happy BD to me

Birthday Flowers

Lettuce Turnip the Beets

Birthday Flowers



Hogfish Bar and Grill

My little flower child
First pizza crust

Higgs Beach-Last Day

Leaving the Keys

Lunch at Zaxby's

Since I have become a mom I am hyper aware of how quick the time goes-mostly because we are busy all the time.(See what I did there?) But one of the interesting thing is how riddled with timing raising kids has become. We count down the days until baby arrives and then we count the weeks, months, years of their lives and we wrap our lives in TIMING..etc etc.

 Time plays an integral part in child development. I have SO ENJOYED #dembabies taking their time to crawl. Dru is all over the place since July 26. He is still technically doing more of a slither but he is fast and in the last few nights has been rocking on his hands and knees so his full on crawl should be happening soon. I was not concerned that he wasn't crawling yet because I have SO enjoyed him staying put right in my arms where all is right in my world. Moms are always posting about how time is going too fast, and time should slow down so I am O B S E S S E D with taking in every sniff, every snuggle, every hug, every lean, every kiss, every smile, every giggle E V E R Y day. This creates a more manageable environment for me in which I don't feel like time is flying by me. I force myself to be present in moments so that I can take mental snapshots of my baby girl putting her chubby little hands on my face and smiling a big toothy smile and my little boy shyly resting his head on my shoulder when a stranger gives him attention. Roxy isn't ready to crawl yet and I am just fine with doing things in her own time.

Here's a bit from the babies' 8 month Photo session. I love documenting these moments.

So- until next time. xoxo