Today I wrote my first article. I'm a blabber by nature, a blogger self righteously- but I like to share my brain's activity, even if it is only interesting to my family. (If my Grammy B were alive she would totally dig my blog). Having a deadline made me feel a little like I was back in college, but I enjoyed it. Hopefully I will be able to share it when it is printed and in case you're wondering, actual dollars. Someone is paying me money for my words. I can't believe this is happening.
Writing usually puts me in a pretty great mood. Even if I have to go back to a hard time and re-live it in order to share it effectively, it is healing. There is a certain health in going to your bad places for a quick visit to remind yourself why you don't live there anymore. Bad relationships, awkward situations, stagnant periods of time in your life?? We all have them. The important part is to not live there anymore and dwell no longer in the wayward ways of your youth, or whatever you did yesterday. Sometimes aches and pains stick around like garlic at lunch time but you can rid yourself of the power they have over you by making choices. Before I get all self-helpy on you, I'll move on.
I was thinking today about what an awful employee I was. I know at least 2 of my former supervisors are reading this so go ahead and shake your head and purse your lips. The truth is, I never felt like I was doing what I was supposed to be doing...until now. I feel whole, I feel complete and I feel reliable for the first time in my life. To my friends who need me, I have most often been reliable. To my parents or my siblings- I am there if they need me- I got yo back. For whatever reason, I have never been a reliable employee. This is a shame, truly. It's half humor/half humiliation what a terrible employee I was. My favorite part about work was not working. When I was at work I gave my most effective and efficient "ALL" which usually wasn't enough for someone at any particular point in the day. My loathe for jobbing comes from a variety of places, one which includes a wildly cruel human who hated my guts and shot darts at my face with her eyes at every opportunity. A plague on her house anyway. She sucks.
Back to the good stuff..
Being a mom feels good and right and as if I'm not searching for the next thing. I love watching my babes grow and learn and I love not missing out on hardly anything that they have going on. Some women fit well at home, and that woman is me. I'm even learning to cook- so there WILL be a cold day in Hell and pigs WILL fly some day! Get over yourself! You can do whatever you want to do, but doing what God intends feels SOOOOO gooooood!!!! Bless you for reading this rambling nonsense, and not judging me, and if you are judging me- not commenting. ha! Let's have a moment of silence for my most precious and amazing husband who puts up with this creature of crazy..Love him the most. Until next time. xoxo